It’s a whirlwind—no doubt about it. This year’s Purim-meets-Erev-Shabbos is a marathon that will have even the elite superwomen among us panting, racing through an endless amount of tasks. Mishloach manos, Megillah reading, seudahs, Shabbos prep, cleaning—and that’s before factoring in the meltdowns that will make you gape at the true beauty of sugar-fueled tiny humans.

It’s a holy day, a day we all want to show up for—to daven, say Tehillim, and create space for the Kedushas Hayom to sink in. But it’s also the perfect storm of people, places, and things—a collision course for chaos that’s unimagined beforehand.

One thing is certain: it won’t be perfect. It will be beautiful, spiritual, and chaotic all at once. And that’s okay. Because perfection isn’t our goal. As Jewish women, we aim to bring Hashem and the essence of the Yom Tov into our homes—with as much presence of mind as possible. And sometimes, that means staying calm and okay even when it all starts hitting the fan.

Having a solid plan—a thought-out guide for this day—is crucial. Whether you follow it to the T or end up winging most of it, you’ll still feel calmer knowing what to do (and what not to do). A little intentional planning will help you make the most of this very short, very packed day. (Take a look at my Purim planner at the bottom of this article!)

And sometimes, knowing what not to do first gives us the best framework to build on.

Here’s my list of things not to do:

1. Laundry

I get it—there’s nothing more satisfying than an empty laundry bin. But do yourself a favor: get all your loads done the day before, and once you’ve got everything you need for Purim and Shabbos, step away from the washing machine. No matter how tempting it is.

For any stained items? Toss them in cold water, walk away, and deal with them later. They’ll be waiting for you. Shabbos, on the other hand, won’t.

2. Cook all of Shabbos on Friday

Your freezer is your best friend here. This Shabbos, double any dishes that freeze well—and for anything that doesn’t reheat nicely, prep it and freeze it raw.

Trust me, you’ll be thanking yourself later, silently patting yourself on the back (not self-consciously at all, of course) when you’re pulling out fully prepped Shabbos food and the only thing running through your mind is “BED. BED. BED.”

Sometimes, the secret to a calm day is knowing what to skip.

– Skip the long-distance mishloach manos deliveries. Everyone will understand.

– Skip the last-minute costume chaos by laying out each child’s pile the night before.

– Skip trying to do it all yourself. If there’s someone who can take even a tiny part off your plate, let them.

Let’s be real—there’s winging it, and then there’s winging it with a plan (which, yes, is a real thing). Knowing what’s happening, when, and where? That’s the difference between feeling like you’re somewhat in control vs. looking around 30 minutes before the zeman and realizing you forgot to defrost the kugel and still have six mishloach manos to drop off.

Here’s what a solid plan actually does for you:

– You’ll know when things are happening. What time is the early Megillah reading at the shul down the block? Until when will Ruchele’s teacher be home? And at what point do you need to start defrosting said kugel so it doesn’t double as a weapon?

– You’ll actually have a list of delivery addresses (psst, there’s a perfect address template in the Daily Rhythm Planner, just saying), and you won’t forget the little deli roll thingies from your pre-planned menu. No more last-minute “ehh, let’s just redo the whole thing” moments.

– Most importantly? You’ll actually delegate. A little pre-planning lets the people around you know what they’re doing when, so you’re not juggling it all alone. Future you will be so grateful.

And future-you? She deserves that.

The tricky part about planning and prep is—it always feels like it should take less time than it actually does. You think, “How long can it take to assemble a few mishloach manos?” or “I’ll just cook on Thursday night—it’ll be fine.” And then suddenly, it’s Erev Purim, your kitchen looks like a bakery explosion, and you’re muttering “never again” under your breath while trying to tie a ribbon with one hand and stir soup with the other.

Starting early is not about being extra—it’s about future-you not wanting to cry. The more you get done in small, manageable pieces, the less you’ll be scrambling later on.

It’s never the big, obvious tasks that trip you up. It’s usually not the Mishloach Manos, the seudah, or even the Shabbos food. It’s the tiny details—the ones no one thinks about until they’re suddenly a massive problem. The pre-teen  that’s crying because she didn’t have time to shower. The puffy red clown nose that vanished. The road that’s closed, causing a full-blown crisis.

A few minutes of planning for those little, overlooked details can save you a whole lot of stress on Purim day. And don’t worry—I’ve got you covered with a detailed checklist download that includes all the “Wait! I forgot—” moments.

Purim is wondrous, holy, and just a little bit overwhelming—especially when it rolls right into Shabbos. The reality is: it doesn’t have to feel like chaos. A little planning, a little prepping, and a whole lot of letting go of perfection can turn it into a day you actually enjoy.

So breathe. Do what you can. Let go of what you can’t.

And **download the checklist**—because future-you is going to love having it.

Like what you see in this Purim planner? These templates are also part of the Daily Rhythm Planner. Check it out here!